本帖最后由 wjlook 于 2018-3-2 20:22 编辑
小孩（6年级）逐渐喜欢上英语，最近喜欢写些东西，虽然感觉有很多的错误，但一直鼓励他，贴在这里希望得到大家的指导，谢谢了！
HELLO，PARIS
Chapter 1
Henry Nawa stood on the porch. It had been a long time since he had seen those little rats, but he was ready, his power would kill them if he wanted to. But inside, he wanted to protect them from danger. from he. Then, his wife, Dora Nawa came outside and said in a low voice “The SVR is coming on the 10 o’clock plane. We better be off now, Don’t take the bottle.” And they were off, left the house and the strongest power in the world waiting for the SVR spy.
Johnson Nawa didn’t know what hit him until today. His father was dead! The most greatest dad in the whole world was dead, gone! His mother was gone too! They had travel to Spain and dead in the house of their own. The SVR spy had gone there and found two cold bodies there, cold bodies. He didn’t know what his sister would think if she know that they are……murdered. The spy, Arsefwa Aski told him that there were something for him and his sister. She gave him one bottle, only one for him, not for his sister. No, don’t think about her! She was just a beast who hated dad and want him to die! She cares nothing but herself. A beast. He looked at the bottle, he looked at his collection. when his father left for Spain, he put his bottle in a strange angle. Johnson put the bottle on the collection’s top. He stand on his bed with tears, he said softly “In the name of Lord, I’ll give this collection to Mark•S•Nawa, Johnson Nawa’s dead father. May he sleep in peace” He began to cry, then he sat up and he gasped, standing by the door, was a girl who hadn’t visit him for years, her sister, was standing by the door.
“Hello, John, your parents are dead, huh? Heard it from SVR” said his sister, “Natalie Nawa, they’re your parents too! You disown them! And I don’t want anything to do with you! Your last name ought to be ‘cold blooded’! Ruin the ‘Nawa’ name!” Growled Johnson，his sister, a cold blooded 13 years old, had killed his uncle and aunt in an argument. And her parents disown her for good. His dad oldest brother, Henry, thought it was his dad who killed them. And said that he will pay back. And disappeared in the Nawa family.
Natalie smiled, she said with evil “bro. You’re just a dumbhead! Dweeb! Nawa’s are all cold blooded! Except for you and Mark. And I, Natalie Nawa was not going to let you go! Mark is dead, and you too” she took out a knife and charge for him
Johnson thought that he was dead! But then he remember his KungFu skill. He gave Natalie a flying kick right on the chest. It kick Natalie’s air out, then, using all his strength, he kicks Natalie. But hit the “breaking wall”, the “breaking wall” could break in a moment. And Johnson is not allow to touch it. The house shook and it gave crack. Johnson looked at his bottle collection one last time. It was three letters! F·L·V!What is it?He didn’t know.The wall gave another shake.He had no choice but to jump out of the window.That’s when the whole house broke down, with Natalie Nawa still in it.
Chapter2
The park wasn’t really a good place to stay in. But for Johnson it is better than nothing. The house was broke into dust. It seems as if there was nothing at all. No house. No people. No family. The teenager was hurt by the police for murder Natalie. He wanted to cry loudly. No family with him, he was alone. He was sleeping on the bench in the park. He couldn’t fall asleep. Police was searching the park all day long, and now they went back to snore. But Johnson was sure there was still someone out there. Suddenly he heard footsteps and voices, he jumped into the bushes. The voices came nearer. It sounds familiar. Then he knew it was Natalie Aski (Arsefwa Aski) and uncle Henry. What on earth are they doing here? He did not say anything, but listen.
“Johnson must be round here. I guess those cops was right about he was a Jerk” said Henry.
“I guess too, SVR did not think that childs (children)”
“Shut up about SVR! Besides, your English is worse than Natalie!” Growled Henry.
“I’m going to siy(say) is that we must before the police and if gets big, FBI, the police will protect him. We must kill him. Blood for blood!” Said Arsefwa in a Russia accent. Hearing this, made Johnson’s blood ran cold. Then the worse thing happened, he sneezed.
“A-Cho”
Henry jumped and screamed! The SVR spy was scared, but she took her black-gun and said “Come out! I know where you is! Or I’ll shoot all way through the park!” Johnson was scared to death, but he thought fast, if he is caught, he is dead. So he run. He ran through bushes, he heard Arsefwa shouting “He is there! Kill him!” He heard a “bang!” Behind him. “Good bye, world! Good bye forever!” He shouted loudly. He was about to die, under his uncle’s gun!
He waited for his eyes to went black. But it didn’t come. What was happening? Isn’t Henry fired all ready? He turned around. In the moonlight, he could see a shape of a girl in front of him. And when that girl turned around, he gasped. It was Natalie Nawa, his elder sister was in front of him. And blood was all over.
He was about to ran to his sister when the gun shoot again. This time, it hits Natalie’s shoulder. Again, the bullet zinged into Johnson’s foot. He yelled loudly! There was no time to waste. He put Natalie’s unmoved body on his shoulder and ran for their lives.
Henry didn’t run right away. He phoned someone then he and Arsefwa chased as fast as they could. They didn’t see anything but the kids, the two rats. Henry was too hot-headed that he shot on the street! One or two people went down by accidentally shot them. Henry was really angry “Where are those beasts? I’ll kill him! That Johnson! I can’t believe Natalie had changed sides! Our ‘Warrior’ never let anyone out!” “Duh!(“yes” in Russian) can’t let him go! Her too!” Said Arsefwa
“I won’t let you go, too” Rang a voice behind them. They turn around, and they were handcuffed a second later by Unite States police.