[家园共建] 分享一下闺蜜的幼儿园经理的育儿之道-就是全英文的 得耐心看

又看到您的贴了，真开心。

文章挺好的。谢谢分享。

说不可以确实要具体一点，不然宝宝会逆反或者有挫败感吧；
给宝宝选择也是转移注意力的一种，呵呵；在卡由里看过类似的片段，卡由大冬天的要穿心爱的短袖体恤，这时候要解释一下会感冒噢，
身体会不舒服，然后再取出两件合适的，让挑选一下，挺聪明的（我一直觉得卡由很适合家长看，呵呵，我学到很多）
firmly and calmly也是很重要，父母确实得淡定，不然后患无穷。

choose your battles. 这句我喜欢，呵呵，虽然不会真把亲子当成是战场，但是就像跟任何人交往一样，其实没那么多事儿，不用太当回事儿。

Drive her to distraction
Even a preschooler can be easily distracted from trouble. When a delicate figurine catches her eye in the department store, quickly point out how the light reflects in a mirror across the aisle, or divert her with a question ("What should we have for lunch?"), a toy, or a little snack. Meanwhile, keep her out of the way of temptation. Older preschoolers are easier than younger children to shop with, and more receptive to up-front distraction, too: "We can't play with that china doll, but we can try out the wind-up toys over here."
这对我儿子不管用啊 他特么忒执着 即使他可能当时分散了注意力 但是大部分时候能在下句话的时候就拐回来了 一说起来恨得我牙痒痒啊

mark一下。有空再看。
转移注意力是我家哄孩子的必备大法。

Offer options
Your preschooler wants to feel independent and in control. So rather than issuing a flat-out denial when she begs for some chocolate before lunch, offer her a choice between halved grapes and apple slices. Or let her pick a treat that she can eat after lunch. If she typically insists on wearing an out-of-the-question outfit (like a bathing suit in December), give her two acceptable outfits to choose between each morning. Though she may not be thrilled with the choices you've offered her, she will eventually learn to accept them.
有我老爸在的时候这个成功率很低 木有办法 只要我爸在 我儿子不接受任何妥协 唉



dbl于2012-7-23 16:59补充以下内容：
学习了 谢谢LZ分享

过来学习，呵呵

还真是得耐心看。

学习了，以后慢慢应用。

全英文的还真的要慢慢耐心的看了。

不错，虽然只看了一个开头。收藏了等哟时间时再看啦

本帖最后由 肉肉奶奶 于 2012-7-23 18:44 编辑

LZ挺好的分享！我花了半个多小时把正文翻译了一下，给习惯看中文的家长作参考。

Pre – School Children – The alternative to “No”  
对学龄前儿童，除了说“不要XX”，我们还能这样说――

What to expect at this age这个年龄段的孩子会是什么样的呢
Maybe your preschooler ignores the word "no," or maybe you'd just like to take a more positive approach to disciplining her. Luckily, there are plenty of alternatives to this overused command – and for good reason. Children often become immune to the word, and you may find that it takes ten no’s to get your child to respond. Whether you're trying to keep your preschooler out of trouble or teach her right from wrong, try a better, more effective approach than the "n" word.
也许你家的学龄前宝宝完全不理会你说“不要XX”，也许你想用更加正面的语言来管教他。幸运的是，比起被滥用了的“不要XX”，我们还有很多选择，效果也更好。孩子们往往对“不要XX”都免疫了，可能你要说上十遍他才搭理你呢。无论你是想让孩子少惹麻烦还是从错误中引导他走向正确，都试一试比说“不要XX”更有效的方法吧。

What you can do 你可以这样做

Rephrase 重新措辞
Put a positive spin on your request. Instead of saying no, tell her clearly what she can do instead. Rather than barking, "No! Don't throw the ball in the living room," for instance, try "See if you can roll the ball down the hall". If she's in the middle of an art project and is getting glue all over the floor, help her put newspaper down under her work. This gives her something to do rather than something to stop doing. When you have to act quickly to keep her safe, substitute a more direct warning, such as "Stop!" or "Hot!"
用正面语言来表述要求。与其说“不要XX”，不如清晰地告诉她应该如何做。如果你想大声嚷“不要在客厅里扔球玩！”，那么改为说“让我们在走廊里滚球玩吧！”如果她做美术作品时把胶水弄得满地都是，帮她在下面垫张报纸。这样可以让她做某事而非停做某事。如果由于安全等问题，你需要她立即做出反应，就要直接警告她，如“停！”或“热！”

Offer options 提供选择
Your preschooler wants to feel independent and in control. So rather than issuing a flat-out denial when she begs for some chocolate before lunch, offer her a choice between halved grapes and apple slices. Or let her pick a treat that she can eat after lunch. If she typically insists on wearing an out-of-the-question outfit (like a bathing suit in December), give her two acceptable outfits to choose between each morning. Though she may not be thrilled with the choices you've offered her, she will eventually learn to accept them.
你的学龄前宝宝希望感觉独立自主。所以，当她在午饭前要求吃巧克力时，与其直接拒绝，不如给她选择，是吃半串葡萄呢，还是几片苹果，或是让她选择一样食品她可以饭后吃。如果她坚持穿不适合的衣服（比如冬天时要穿泳衣），那么每天早上给她准备两件适合的衣服让她来选。尽管她可能不是很喜欢你提供的衣服，最终她也会学会接受的。

Drive her to distraction 分散她的注意力
Even a preschooler can be easily distracted from trouble. When a delicate figurine catches her eye in the department store, quickly point out how the light reflects in a mirror across the aisle, or divert her with a question ("What should we have for lunch?"), a toy, or a little snack. Meanwhile, keep her out of the way of temptation. Older preschoolers are easier than younger children to shop with, and more receptive to up-front distraction, too: "We can't play with that china doll, but we can try out the wind-up toys over here."
我们可以轻易地分散学龄前儿童注意力，让麻烦不再。当她在百货公司里看中了一件精致的小雕像，我们可以马上指给她看那镜子的反光如何穿过走廊，或是转移她的注意力的一个问题（“中午吃什么好呢？”）、一件玩具、或是一点零食。同时，带她远离引诱。带大孩子购物比较容易，他们也比小孩子更容易接受直率的转换理由：“我们不能玩那个瓷娃娃，但我们可以玩这个上弦的玩具。”


Avoid the issue 避免此问题
Whenever you can, keep your preschooler out of situations where you'll have to say no, and opt instead for safe environments that encourage her sense of adventure and curiosity. Your home should still be conscientiously childproofed, with dangerous and valuable items kept out of her reach. And choose places where she's free to roam – the playground or your sister's big garden, for instance, over the glassware section in a department store or Great-Grandma Elsie's antique-filled home. And if you’re food shopping, try to avoid the sweet aisle.
尽你的努力，不要对你的学龄前宝宝说“不要XX”。选择安全的环境，鼓励她的求知欲并勇于探索。你们的家在儿童安全方面应该是一丝不苟的，不要让她接触到危险品或贵重物品。她自由活动的地方也是有选择性的，比如：游乐场或是你姐姐的大花园，百货商店的玻璃器皿部或是太祖母那满是古董的家。如果你在购买食物，尽量别去糖果部。

You can't isolate your child from all situations where you'll have to say no, of course, but life will be easier for both of you – and you'll be able to say yes more often – if you limit them.
你当然不可能完全不说“不要XX”，但是当你更多地用正面措辞时，你和孩子都会觉得生活更美好。

Keep in mind, though, that many preschoolers enjoy shopping and will behave quite well – if you take a few precautions. Plan shopping trips for times when your child is well rested, and don't overdo it – an hour or two at the shopping centre is plenty.
你要牢记，许多学龄前宝宝是很喜欢购物的，如果你预先做些措施，他们也可以表现得很好。比如：在孩子休息好时才去购物，购物时间不要太长 － 购物一两小时就够了。

Ignore minor infractions 忽视小捣乱
Life presents plenty of meaningful opportunities to teach your child discipline. Don't go looking for extras. If she's splashing in a puddle and you're on your way home anyway, why not let her? If she wants to wear her favourite T-shirt to bed, what's the harm? Choose your battles. Indulge her sense of adventure, fun and exploration whenever you can. If she's safe and you don't have to say no, let it slide.
生活中有很多很有意义的机会可以教育孩子，但不要约束得太过份了。如果她爱踩水洼而你们反正也是要回家了，就让她踩吧！如果她想穿她最爱的T恤睡觉，也没什么坏处吧？你要选择性地跟她较量，尽可能地满足她的冒险、兴趣和探究。只要她是安全的，你不必须制止，就顺其自然吧。

Say it like you mean it 有话直说
Of course, when her behaviour does matter, and you really do need to say no, don't waffle. Say it firmly (but calmly), with conviction and a poker face – "No! Don't pull the cat's tail." An amused "No, no, sweetie" sends your preschooler mixed messages and certainly won't discourage her. When she responds, give her a smile or a hug and follow up with something affirmative – "Yes! What a good listener you are!"
当然，当她的行为确实不当，你真的要说“不要XX”时，不要转弯抹角。你的语气要平静而坚定，表情要严肃且坚决 － “不行！不要拽猫尾巴！”如果你一副说笑的样子“不好啊，宝贝”，会让孩子迷惑也当然无法制止她。当她照你的话做了，给她一个微笑或是一个拥抱，称赞她吧“对！你真听话！”

翻译的真好，谢谢。

肉奶很给力{:soso_e179:}

看不懂{:soso_e130:}

仔细看完了，挺好的方法

谢谢楼主这么好的文章，更谢谢“肉奶”的精彩翻译

感谢分享！

谢谢分享，来学习了。

谢谢分享   

谢谢，终于看懂了，哈哈。

谢谢楼主的文章也谢谢肉奶的翻译

肉奶太历害了，没有你的翻译，我就不能读懂此篇文章了，谢谢

谢谢楼主的文章，也谢谢肉肉奶奶的翻译。收藏着，让孩子爸也看看。

很好啊，正面管教

学习了，谢谢